Sociopaths possess an Insidious ability/tactic:
They build you up.
Stroke your ego.
Groom you.
Play with you.
Intentionally trick you.
Make you feel special, loved, and unique
(like everyone wants to feel.)
Then BOOM!...drop you cold.
Watch you squirm.
Your manipulation is for their
benefit...so they can feel good.
Like a cat with a mouse, they let you go,
then sharpen their claws on you,
relentlessly playing mind games.
But eventually you realize;
the whole point of building you up
was to knock you down.
When people show you who they really are,
you need to take it in, and get away from them.
YOU are responsible for caring about you.
You are responsible for not being swayed
by a smoothe talker who's saying all the right words.
You are responsible...
for discernment,
for taking action,
not accepting lies,
deciding for yourself what you are willing to tolerate.
For confronting and verbalizing your discontent
and your needs....standing up for yourself.
To accept abuse is to invite abuse.
Stop putting so much emphasis on another person.
Stop allowing yourself to be manipulated.
Start trusting your gut and not outside influences.
You can't take care of yourself and the person abusing you;
you owe everything to yourself, and nothing to a user.
There is no cure for their sickness; they feign a need and
interest in you merely to push your buttons and play on your
compassion.
See it for what it is, not what their charms tell you it is.
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The bitter truth can't compete with a beautiful lie.
You can't take on a sociopath because it is an intricately-veiled
massive deceit they have constructed. People like the illusion
they project.
They will hate you for speaking against the object of their affection,
for trying to 'undermine' their relationship, for making them question
someone/something that makes them feel so good, for inferring that
the listener/receiver isn't smart enough to have figured this out for
themselves--or that they were dumb enough to be fooled in the first
place, etc.
The messenger does always get shot.
You will not only give the socio/narc a chance to play the victim
in public, garnering more sympathy, but you will draw attention
to yourself and be targeted for further problems from the socio.
And you will become a social pariah because the charm of the
socio is very inspiring of loyalty in people.
Their fiction is bulletproof.
So before you think of taking on a narc's illusions publicly,
think about how defensive you would be if someone tried to
sully something you cherished. A narc's facade is all they
have...and they go to great lengths to create a serious bond
with their source.
The response is about as good as confrontational religious
remarks at a dinner party.
It's not about whether or not they deserve to be taken down
and exposed; it's about the likelihood of it happening, and
keeping yourself from suffering even further loss and difficulty.
People love their fictions.
They love their illusions.
They love being ignorant and oblivious.
People say they want the truth, but they really don't.
Most of them would rather stay in the dark than be forced to
swallow a bitter pill they aren't ready for. It's hard to see all
that invested time, energy, and trust go up in smoke; people
get crazy when the shit hits the fan. Don't get caught in the middle,
unless you're especially invested in the well-being of potential
marks/victims.
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Sociopaths take a long time to figure out and recognize
for what they truly are.
They're cunning, patient...working long-range plans
with people. They're seductive and hard to read.
They're chameleons, and master liars.
They see right through to the heart of most folks,
employing psycholgical tactics and saying what we
want to hear... playing us like a banjo.
They distract you with their alluring charm, and they
don't wear emotions on their sleeves (if in fact they
have any.)
Their whole purpose is to use you..and they're quite
skilled at it. They've spent their whole lives in an inner
world of preparing and observing for how to manipulate
others and get what they want.
They actually get a joy from not only making fools of
people (and thus feeling superior,) but from any response
of pain that results.
Once you realize you're in their sights, it's probably quite
late in the game.
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