It's Not Unusual

When you tell the truth about someone who's evil,
it's not a matter like in the movies where everyone
cheers and heads start nodding in affirmative approval.

The person you confront doesn't say "You're right," and
set about correcting the issues.

There are no apologies, no deep and burning turning
around of one's life because of the public embarrassment.
No introspection and curiosity about how to join a
commune and make restitution.

No, in Reality, confronted con men DENY.

They dig their heels in deeper on their stories.
They act as if the revealer is the immoral one, and they set
about destroying your reputation and relationships with new
elaborate lies and shadow campaigns.

They funnel their rage at being caught into undermining your
credibility and inventing more sweeping manipulations to
sucker people. Coming clean does not occur to them.

Exposure turns sociopaths and narcissists into trapped
beasts, and that leads to rabid crazy-making. (Yes, moreso
than usual.)

They make your truth-telling into a 'patently absurd attack' and
are then, 'rightfully' filled with righteous indignation, they resent
and blame and get bombastic. They bully and intimidate and
threaten. They put up such great appearances to continue and
recommit to their lies that people think you must surely be out
of your mind.

So be wary of trying to topple one....
Even what should be their defeat they can turn their way.

Torn Up

A confidence man is an exquisite study in self-sufficient organisms.
They take a person's own fears, desires, and other personal innermost aspects--
the pieces of your most basic nature, your soul--and use them as ammunition
against that person, their target.

In a sense, you're at war with yourself.
They stimulate a place in you that has never been touched--an intimacy
unparalleled--so that it not only a deeply private matter you want kept hidden,
but the embarrassment at being used in such a way is intense.

That's the violation; they prey on the innermost subliminal feelings,
and once they achieve what they want, you are left once again alone,
but feeling the loss of that false promise.

They put you in touch with your dreams, believing in the possibility,
having primal desires awakened,...and then you're left holding a bill
of goods.

But the precision of the predatory assessment, the execution, the
detachment from the sickness of what's done and the absolute dedication
to one's own survival at all costs is an admirable quality within the
sociopath. Surely there is something to be learned from dissecting their
methodology and drive, so we might become more adept at survival
ourselves.

Ruthlessness may not necessarily be a learned skill, but it's for
damned sure a useful one. At the very least, we have to stop beating
ourselves up...or allowing others to do so.

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"What Just Happened Here?"

The fantastic James Wolk from the criminally short-lived "Lone Star."

Opposition is easy to squelch when you're in a position of power.

Convincing opponents you care, however?

Charming them so as to smile while they swallow the bitter pill you've

administered to them?

Conning them into thinking that taking part in their own demise is

their own idea?

Disarming them enough to distract them from abuse, and in fact

interpret it as acceptable?

That's mastery.

And you can bet it doesn't happen by mistake.

***

"Narcissists" Documentary: Revealing

A well-done, stunningly intricate delving into of the psyche and patterns.

Worth the time to watch; view it in segments if you can't get through
the whole thing in one setting.

And please pass it on to anyone you know to be involved with a narcissist or
even suspect of being involved. While dealing with the sociopath, one's idea
of what the rest of the world is all about gets turned upside down.

Some exposing of truths and tactics might just break through and save
someone's life.

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By Any Other Name

You might can imagine several other possible blog names for this site;

By Any Means Unnecessary.
The Beautiful Lie.
Me, Myself, and I.
They Who Know No Other.
Dead Inside.
Liars, Cons, & Users.
The Hollow Reflection.
Human Quicksand.
(and many, many more.)

It seems that narcissists and sociopaths are multiplying.

Maybe it's the times; perhaps after TV and film
fascination with such characters, people are emulating 
them in greater numbers. Maybe it's just a matter of
being more openly discussed. Perhaps the media-based
generations have allowed us to access one another
and compare notes on Tricky Bastards where once
we might just have considered these folks "ladies men"
or "good businessmen" or, just as likely, "successful."

Here's where I will reveal the tactics of the sociopath
and do my best to share how to spot them, how to keep
from being used and abused by one, how to strengthen
yourself, and how to recuperate from having known one
already.

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