Sociopaths have no understanding of actual emotions;
they understand how to manipulate the emotions of others,
like a big science experiment which they are completely
detached from.
(Well, I guess they do feel a sense of superiority...and they
feel frustrated when everything doesn't go their way.)
However, what's confusing is that the socio doesn't act
robotic or disconnected; they feign the emotions which
they know will elicit a specific response from their target.
They seem like regular people; if anything, they seem
'better' than the average person! (First Red Flag!!)
A sociopath depends on other people's adherence to
social cues and protocols to prod them into action. They
are the masters of people-pleasing, with a dark agenda.
But alas, we can't just wish this away.
Those of us who are prone to these kinds of people have
to change. Notice the pattern. Heed the warning signs.
Change the dynamic.
Instead of allowing it or being passive, we must prepare to
meet the wolves at the door. Naivete won't allow for our
survival.
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Unexposed or naive folks fail to comprehend how
sociopaths are not easily recognizable, nestled as they
are in the midst of their 'perfect' lives.
They are not characters in a film, filled with robotic
maniacal evil, nor obvious serial-killer scum. (Yes, most
serial killers can be categorized as sociopaths, but not
all sociopaths are serial killers.)
Anyhow, the merits of being a likable, congenial,
poised, powerful, popular, central figure should be
obvious.
Gregarious, well-connected folks have access to much
more of people's money, secrets, children, positions,
favors, influence, and so on. Plus, the icing on the cake
is that the act of misleading and using other people--through
the facade of being a good family man and regular Joe--is
a sociopath's wet dream.
Another aspect is that many highly-wrought, OCD-
controlled, manic, over-achieving socios do what they
do--like the Energizer Bunny--and become pillars of the
community (charitable, magnanimous, smiling constantly,
god-fearing and church-loving) because, you know, after all
that they have given....oughtn't they have the right to some
letting off of the steam?
Surely one thing offsets the other, right?
Should they not be afforded a blind eye to a silly little
transgression...or a lifetime of them? Doing all this good
lays down the path to getting a doorway into the good
graces of those they victimize, but it also provides a
'balance' (in their sick minds, at least) which allows them
the leeway to commit their dark deeds on the side.
An occasional naughtiness isn't such a big deal, right?
Especially since the rules don't apply the same for a
socio.
Everyone is the hero of their own story. Everyone.
And that's simply more true for a socio. The sicker you are,
the more capable you are of justifying even the most
incessant and horrific of insanities.
The longer they go without getting caught and the better they
do at their facade of goodness (achieving acclaim and reward,)
the easier they can convince themselves that what you're doing
is okay...or that they're unstoppable.
Even convincing themselves that their actions are not that big
a deal...and if people weren't so stupid, they wouldn't be able
to take such easy advantage of them in the first place. So,
really, isn't it kind of their own fault that they're being hurt,
abused, robbed, and swindled?
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Sociopaths possess an Insidious ability/tactic:
They build you up.
Stroke your ego.
Groom you.
Play with you.
Intentionally trick you.
Make you feel special, loved, and unique
(like everyone wants to feel.)
Then BOOM!...drop you cold.
Watch you squirm.
Your manipulation is for their
benefit...so they can feel good.
Like a cat with a mouse, they let you go,
then sharpen their claws on you,
relentlessly playing mind games.
But eventually you realize;
the whole point of building you up
was to knock you down.
When people show you who they really are,
you need to take it in, and get away from them.
YOU are responsible for caring about you.
You are responsible for not being swayed
by a smoothe talker who's saying all the right words.
You are responsible...
for discernment,
for taking action,
not accepting lies,
deciding for yourself what you are willing to tolerate.
For confronting and verbalizing your discontent
and your needs....standing up for yourself.
To accept abuse is to invite abuse.
Stop putting so much emphasis on another person.
Stop allowing yourself to be manipulated.
Start trusting your gut and not outside influences.
You can't take care of yourself and the person abusing you;
you owe everything to yourself, and nothing to a user.
There is no cure for their sickness; they feign a need and
interest in you merely to push your buttons and play on your
compassion.
See it for what it is, not what their charms tell you it is.
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